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Egyptian lovers choose informal marriage

CAIRO: They could have waited years to save up for a wedding party, rings, dowry and furnished flat -- the costly prerequisites of a conventional Egyptian marriage.

Instead, the 21-year-old computer student and his lover paid a lawyer 1,000 pounds ($290) for an unofficial, "urfi", marriage contract they signed with two male witnesses two years ago.

Since then, the couple, who asked not to be named, have met in an hotel every two or three weeks. Their liaison is not formally registered. Many Islamic scholars would contest its validity. They have kept it secret from their families.

"I think urfi marriage is a good solution for two people in love because it is very hard for people in Egypt to get a normal marriage at this age," said the student.

"It (formal marriage) requires a totally different financial set-up," he said. "It also means my father has to know, and support me, and I have to be working.

"Normal marriage means more commitment and if you want to divorce you would face financial obligations," he added.

Because they are unregistered, no one knows how many urfi marriages have been contracted in Egypt. Popular wisdom says they are on the increase, especially among hard-up students.

But urfi marriages attract people with other motives, including wealthy Arab foreigners holidaying in Egypt who use them to "marry" poor local girls.

Muslim men are theoretically allowed to take up to four wives, but some who want to marry again prefer to do so in secret -- without giving their new wife financial rights.

"I chose urfi marriage because under normal marriage, the authorities would notify my first wife," said Emad, a 37-year-old financial manager, referring to his second marriage to a 23-year-old. "Under present circumstances this was the only way for us."

Emad, with two children by his first wife, said some of his neighbours know of his urfi marriage and are blackmailing him, demanding money to keep quiet about it.

Last month urfi marriages won implicit legal recognition for the first time when parliament passed a family status law that includes a provision enabling urfi couples to get divorced.

"This is a good development," said novelist and psychiatrist Nawal Saadawi. "I prefer urfi contracts to official marriage because it gives the woman economic independence."

She said legally sanctioned marriage gives a husband full authority over his wife, including the right to force her to return home if she leaves. "He can take a second wife only for sexual satisfaction and no court can prevent him," she said.

Azza Korayem, assistant professor in social studies at the National Centre for Social and Criminal Studies, traced the perceived boom in urfi weddings to low wages and lack of housing. "Ninety percent of the problem is economic," she said.

Urfi marriages are one response to sexual frustration felt by young people unable to afford a conventional marriage.

Egypt's religiously conservative society demands sexual purity before marriage, at least for women, but youngsters are also subject to the alluring influences of modern media.

Mohammed Serag, professor of Islamic studies at the American University in Cairo, said he was glad the new law had allowed divorce in urfi marriages, but voiced disappointment that it had not given urfi wives wider legal rights.-Reuters